How I end my deepest nightmare --
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That day, after our BTT, we took a bus to woodlands MRT. He were sitting infront, I'm standing behind. I see him through the mirror. His face, so close yet so far... The unfamiliar but true face, the ugly but once loved face. Ever since that day I've finally know that's not the one i want and after that day I don't know how to cry.
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That's the time I've finally let go. The day after, he changed his status from Single to "in a relationship". Luckily he break this news after I've let go of him, if not that feeling would be unimaginable - that's the best present he gave. Surprisingly, that's the girl I've suspected long ago. 6 sense is never wrong.
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Its funny - When I saw his status changed to "In a relationship", I gave a smile, thinking, "Chey, 10 days after we break". But one kaypo friend of mine spotted that they started their relationship at 28 FEB, seriously FML, that was 5 days after we break. Last time we were in a relationship 7 days after he break with his previous one without me knowing. I should have thought of it. He did that to the previous one, he will hurt me the same way too. And anyway, they already had something going on before we break so no point counting how many days and this and that. But the first thing that really came to my mind is that, he is having another one when we meet for BTT, that's totally gross.
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And I really want to tell you, those crap you told me when you want a breakup is totally bullshit. What never find a GF within this year, What smoking, What pill, What different, What dream, What only child, What you and me... ...
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But my friends were saying, at least you break up with me is because you've found another girl. And It's not that I'm not good enough. I hope that should be it... ... But not something else.